wedding daze: picking your bridesmaids

One of the greatest and most difficult parts about getting married is picking who you want to stand by your side while marrying the man of your dreams.

Some people will have 10+ bridesmaids.

And others, like myself, will have 4 or even less.

The number DOES NOT matter.

I repeat, the amount of people you have standing by your side while you take a huge leap into life's next step, does NOT, or ever will, matter.

Some people just don't understand that. They think that more people = better friends.

Or some people add bridesmaids &/or groomsmen to make the count even on both sides.

Psst. That doesn't matter either.

When choosing my bridesmaids, I asked myself, "who has made the biggest difference/impact in my life? Who do I want standing by my side, getting ready with me, calming me down when I get nervous?"

Annnnnnndd plenty other questions. But I can guarantee I hurt someone in the process of answering them.

Some people think that they deserve to be "at least a bridesmaid." (whatever that means).

It wasn't about who "deserved" it the most. You are not judged in a friendship by the amount of texts you send each other, how long you've known each other, or by the amount of pictures you have together.

In my opinion, it is about the quality of the moments you've spent together, however many or few they may be, that is a large factor in measuring a friendship.

For our wedding, I had a Matron of Honor, a Maid of honor, and 2 bridesmaids and Zach had 2 Best Men and one groomsman.

People questioned us, made remarks, and looked at us funny when we would introduce or talk about the bridal party. But, it was not their day. It was ours.

And these girls, regardless of their title, were the most important to me and who I wanted up there watching me marry the man of my dreams.

The titles (bridesmaid, maid of honor, matron of honor, etc.) don't matter as much either.

If I get asked to be in someone's wedding as their bridesmaid, I know that it really isn't about the title I'm given, but the honor that I was asked to join them as they embark on this new journey called marriage.

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When you pick your bridesmaids, if you haven't already, keep the following in mind:

1. You do not have to have the same number of bridesmaids and groomsmen.

2. The number of people next to you does not matter.

3. Yes, you CAN have a bridesman. - I almost had my brother be my "Man of Honor" but Zach snagged him as Best Man ;)

4. The less people you have, the cheaper it is. - this one is meant to be a little less serious, but really! It can get costly purchasing gifts for each girl on top of gifting them when you ask them to be in your bridal party.

5. The more people = more people to coordinate with. Working around everyone's schedules can become tasking and even more difficult when you add more people to the mix. Just remember the girls you don't choose to be a bridesmaid that you still want to celebrate with can always be invited to other events like the bachelorette party!

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Now that you're a step closer to choosing who those special people are, you now have to figure out how you want to ask them.

I definitely recommend checking Pinterest out for this one. I could go on and on about my favorite ways to ask, but Pinterest is overflowing with ideas.

I asked my bridesmaids by printing out a free printable (from Pinterest) that said "Will You Be My Bridesmaid/Maid/Matron of Honor?" and gifting them with a necklace from Etsy that had their initial on it & had a little quote on the box.

It was simple, fairly cheap, and the necklace can be worn outside of the wedding.

Another super fun idea, but a little more expensive, is to create a box filled with tons of knick knacks and cute gear.

Some ideas to fill the boxes would be:

- cute note asking them

- mini champagne bottle

- some sort of accessory (necklace, ring, bracelet; Alex & Ani anyone?)

- travel size makeup (i.e. eyeshadow kit, lipstick, perfume etc.)

- nail polish that represents your wedding colors

- to-go mug or personalized tumbler

- workout tanks or tanks that say something bridal ("Team Bride"/"Bride Tribe" etc.)

Among MANY other things.

I suggest taking a look at the companies foxblossom and shopboxfox for some SERIOUSLY cute boxes for multiple occasions. Or another company called teakandtwine for more boxes, but at a little higher price.

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The way you ask isn't as important as WHO you ask. However, there are so many things that can make that this process just a little difficult.

The only thing you need to make sure you do when you make the decision of who you'll ask, is stay to true to yourself. Don't let anyone tell you who should be in the bridal party or who should play what role.

You'll be happier you did.